The Yogipie Rap

Here is the rap, as promised.

Posting some posts to the great tribune
Having zero readers makes me look like a loon
But I don’t care what bird I look like
I only care what you can cook like
Apparently we’re allowed to rip off Mulan these days
But does it really matter the rhymes I say?
Probably two people have ever read one post
Caleb Foote the 27th has probably read the most
I even got a T-shirt to promote my blog
Why do they avoid it like a flaming log?
Yogipie is certainly potent (like a nog)
If it had potential I would read a flaming log
Pay good money for Entertainment Weekly
But my insights on the media don’t plod along meekly
I may not have a great multitude of minions
But I’m not so frickin’ slow to get you my opinions
Well, sometimes the connection gets a little stuck
And I say “Internet Explorer really sucks!”
Then I might not be able to blog for days
But you can still read Yogipie anyways
‘Cause posts in the Archives might give you a laugh
For that feature I’d like to thank the Blogger staff
But there’s also a dichotomy as well as a chronology
For finding tags like camping, airbrushing, and genealogy
I’d like to know the readers I’ve got besides one
If you caught the Disney reference, good for you, you’re not dumb
Write wghoberg@comcast.net
If you read this rhyme, tell me; I’ll see what I get
As for the 27th, I was kidding the fool
Having an old name is actually pretty cool
Farewell, readers (probably only one)
I might rhyme more later, because this was fun

More Movie Reviews

This is late but it is as promised and it includes a bonus review.

Transformers: Transformers starts out in much the same way as Disturbia does: Hot girl is the object of desire, best friend is a weirdo, and of course, Shia LaBeouf in pretty much the same role as Sam, the perv teenage guy. Fun fun fun. Except there's also the part about the army being attacked by giant robots, a conspiracy about the Arctic mission of Sam's great-great-granddad, and a Camaro. The movie is way too long, and the excess of product placement and its ludicrously ginormous budget make me sick, but the talent and production values are all in place. ***

Speed: It was a great, high-octane (?) ride. I can't say action movies are my cup of tea, but this was a good movie. Wait a sec... I don't like tea. ***

The Matrix Reloaded: Where do I begin? This one had a great sex scene, about seventy awesome songs, at least 4 classic fight scenes, The Architect, lotsandlotsandlotsof Smiths, a pair of sunglasses for everyone, a traitorous kiss, and many doors. Everything a great movie needs and then some. Quite possibly the awesomest film ever made. Needless to say I really enjoyed it, would recommend it to anyone, and really want to get my hands on the 3rd installment. ****